And here's the hand, my trusty friend, and gives a hand of thine

One year. I have been doing this blog for one full year. I can’t believe it myself. Happy Blogiversary to me!!

I haven’t been good at updating this week as I’ve been working my second job while on vacation from my regular job and family and friends visiting. In 11 days, I will have worked 73 hours. I will say that having a regular job where I use my brain is much better than the mindlessness of working at the movie theater. When I have come home, I’ve either been too exhausted or too drunk to type. Drunk texting, however, has continued unabated!

Sadly, I have been bad all week. I have eaten junk and not run since Christmas. Walking up and down steps in the theater kills my legs, so I haven’t felt like running at all. I seem to have felt like stuffing all manner of food down my throat, but that is a different matter all together.

There are many things I am grateful for over the past year, and this blog has helped me catalogue a lot of my ups and downs. 2007 will bring many new challenges for me, as I plan on expanding my exercise and be healthier, more focused. And I will be getting to the doctor and find out if this has helped my cholesterol at all.

So for all of you out there, I want to thank you for reading any bits of this and commenting from time to time. I hope it has been worth it.

And I hope that your New Year’s Eve is fun. I will be working 12 hours today, but again, it will be with my mother and at least one of my nephews, so I will be around family.

I’d like to write more about this one year of writing, but I gotta get to work. I hope tonight that you all get to spend time with your loved ones, and that you get to take a cup of kindness yet.

Happy holiday. While the merry bells keep ringing, may your ev'ry wish come true

I hope all of your Holiday time is spent in a place of love, joy and peace. I have spent my time with my family, and we are all stuffed and smiling now. I am off to work later today and the theater with my mother and twin nephews. Even when I work on Christmas I am with family. Then my sister is bringing Christmas dinner to us all (and scoring a free movie) so it is a family event anyway.

I have already run my Christmas 3.1 miles this morning, but then probably negated it by eating tons of food at my parent's house for Christmas brunch. I better slow down or I am going to fat again by January 2.

I hope all of my internet friends out there are spending the holiday with their respective loved ones. Enjoy!

I am being happy now, even though I had a large holiday cheer post done and blogger deleted it somehow.

As I watch the sun go down, watching the world fade away, all I want to do is kiss you goodbye

I am behind in my reading, and so it was with sadness that today that I learned that Tyrone Garner passed away this past September 11. You might not know who Tyrone was, but he is important to every gay American.

In 1998, Tyrone was arrested with his friend, John G. Lawrence, as they were engaged in consensual sex. In 1998 in Texas, it was still illegal for 2 men to engage in consensual sex in the privacy of their own bedroom. A neighbor, who had not only been accused of harassing these two men in the past, had called in a false report of a gunman in the apartment complex, thus allowing the Harris County Sheriff’s deputy to walk into Mr. Lawrence’s unlocked apartment, thus catching the two men in flagrante in the bedroom (This fuckwad would later spent 15 days in jail for pleading guilty to the false report)

Mr. Lawrence and Mr. Garner pled no contest in Texas court, and were given $125 fines each and could have paid the fine and gone on their way.

Instead of going into obscurity, these men did what so many wouldn’t do in the past. They decided to fight it. They decided that the anti-homosexual sodomy laws of Texas were illegal and worth their fight. So they fought. They fought at the Texas Criminal Court, Texas Fourteenth Court of Appeals, the full Texas Court of Criminal Appeals, and then the U.S. Supreme Court.

On June 26, 2003, the U.S. Supreme court found in favor of Messrs. Lawrence and Garner. Only 227 years after we were told “We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men were created equal” by the U.S. Declaration of Independence, 140 years after Mr. Lincoln told us that our nation was “dedicated to the proposition that all men were created equal,” and 137 years after the Fourteenth Amendment to the U. S. Constitution told us that no State could make a law that could “deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws,” could those of us that are gay Americans truly feel free.

I remember where I was when I heard the news: in a car driving to my friend’s house listening to NPR, and I cried. And not because I was free to have sex with another man. Pennsylvania had their law struck down in 1980 when I was 10 years old, so I didn’t have to think about it. I cried because now the United States of America had finally realized that were all are equal, at least in one more important way, one way that heterosexuals hadn’t had to worry about ever, not really. You can’t have gay sex without it being sodomy (usually defined as any non-coital sexual act.)

I broke an anti-sodomy law once, Arkansas’ law. My ex was from there, and we visited his family there in 1993, and though I didn’t know it at the time, I was breaking the law when we did it in his mother’s shower, guest bedroom and basement. The Arkansas anti-sodomy law wasn’t overturned until a state case in 2001.

Along with John G. Lawrence, Tyrone Garner stood up in the face of on-going hatred, in the face of over 200 years of ignorance, and in the face of impossible odds, when he really didn’t need to put himself out there, and he stood up for all of us who couldn’t, didn’t or wouldn’t, and he helped us.

So now I will say Thank You Mr. Garner. You are brave, you are heroic and you are important. May your legacy lead us all into actual equality, but without you we wouldn’t be closer to it. Tyrone, may you Rest in Peace.

For what was said the frivolous response which is now clear - Dead words on deaf ears

I am here today to talk about a serious problem. This could possibly affect everyone of you, sometimes with devastating and expensive results.

Of course, I’m talking about Small External Auditory Ear Canal Opening Syndrome, or SEAECOS. You see, it affects those of us who use the white earphones that came with the iPod. When I was running with the iPod two weeks ago, after about 3 minutes of running, the headphones starting falling out of my right ear canal. After that time, I’ve noticed that the right ear just won’t hold the iPod earphone comfortably anymore.

At work one day, someone noticed that the earphone was falling out, and my shame was suddenly public knowledge. The other kids at work would call me names if they could come up with some derogatory term to describe my small ear canals.

These are the stupid, ubiquitous white earphones that come with the iPod, and according to the Apple website, the earphones “gently fit [the] contour of the inside of the ear for a comfortable, secure fit so that the earphones don't fall out while you're exercising.” LIES!!!

Seems like rubbish to me. Problem is that I’ve gotten used to wearing just the earphones, they are light and easy to pop out when the phone rings at work. They are so much easier to wear instead of big headphones, or cheap headphones, that go around the top of your head.

Sadly, with my SEAECOS, the earphones have become too annoying. Even walking to the printer at work, it sometimes falls out. It makes me sad and annoyed. A bit frustrated as well. And embarrassed.

When I went online to find replacement earphones, they came in many different sizes and shapes, as long as I was willing to pay over $90! The cheapest ones, with attachments for small, medium or large ear canals, started at $99.95 before shipping and handling. All of the cheap ones I’ve bought or had prior to purchasing the iPod don’t fit: they all have that “one-size-fits-all” idea, and clearly, those of us who suffer from SEAECOS don’t believe in “one-size-fits-all”!

Please, do what you can in your community to raise awareness and acceptance of SEAECOS, therefore allowing those of us to be able to buy earphones that actually fit in our ear canals comfortably at a reasonable price.

Thank you for your support. It is only with your help that we can eradicate the idea that all external auditory ear canal openings are the same, and we can all actually enjoy reasonably priced earphones without fear of embarrassment.

If I just breathe let it fill the space in between I'll know everything is alright

Alright, so two days of running 3.1 miles in 30 minutes, and I’ve gained 4 pounds. This morning on the scale I was 226 lbs. I know that yesterday at work we had our holiday lunch, and I did pig out, but I was pigging out last week just as much at times, and I didn’t get up to 226 lbs. No panic, no worries. I knew that the eating would be bad through the holiday season, so that is fine.

Running isn’t a problem with my legs after a 2 week layoff. It is my lungs that give me problems. I get about 18 minutes into the run and my lungs are straining and start feeling shredded. I have no other way to explain it but “shredded.” I don’t stop, I keep running, and tt has taken a few extra minutes on recovery. My lungs feel like a knife has been scraped up and down them. I don’t remember having that problem before, even when I started running last year.

I fear that I may have done some kind of temporary injury to the lungs from the running outdoors in below freezing temperatures. After that first time I ran outside 2 ½ weeks ago, I felt pain. Real, deep down pain in my lungs. Now I didn’t run continuously any of the times I ran outdoors, it was usually starting at 4-5 minutes running, some brisk walking, 3-4 minutes running, some brisk walking, 2-3 minutes running, some brisk walking, 5 minutes running back downhill, then walking 3 minutes back home. So I never really got to minute 18 of breathing heavy.

I think that this will go away, but my real worry is because I’ve had some lung problems in the past. I smoked for about 12 years. As in a regular tobacco user. When I was in college, it was about ½ pack per day because I couldn’t afford any more than that. But after college, I was basically a pack per day smoker.

The last semester my senior year in college, I was having some respiratory problems. I ended up passed out in the cafeteria and was brought to the ER. I had bronchial pneumonia. After that time, I continued to have problems with bronchitis for a couple of years. For most of June 1995, I was hacking and coughing up some awful stuff, and was sick and barely able to breath. And yet, for most of June, this didn’t stop me from smoking, only slowed me down.

I was brought to the hospital on June 29, 1995. I only know the day because it was by boyfriend’s 30th birthday the next day (June 30). I spent the night of June 29th in the hospital, and at some point in the night, I remember clearly trying to come up with a way to take out the 2 IV’s in my arms, sneak down the steps (I thought I was lucky because the steps were near to my room) and have a smoke, get back to the room and reinsert the IV’s without anyone noticing.

After a few minutes of thinking this, realizing that my smoking habit was one of the reasons I was in this condition, I recognized that I had a smoking problem. I didn’t think before that night that I really had a smoking problem. I was never one of those people who would smoke any cigarette when I was out. I smoked my brand and nothing else. Never was able to smoke the cheap ones or menthol. Therefore, when I was a poor college student and didn’t have money for smokes, I wouldn’t smoke, and that made me think I wasn’t addicted.

The next day, Joe’s 30th birthday, I got out of the hospital, had one last cigarette, and we quit together. Due in part to my bronchitis at the time, I never even missed it. It was a relief to not smoke, to be honest. About 2 years later, I tried to smoke while a little drunk in a gay bar with my friends, and I almost choked to death (I did it in front of a cute guy who was smoking, thinking I’d look cool. I didn’t look cool.)

But a year after I quit, I was still having some respiratory problems. So I went to my physician, and we went through a lot of breathing tests and exercises, and it turned out I had some allergies that the symptoms were masked by my smoking (coughing, watery eyes, phlegm) and some weakness in my lungs. That is when I went on steroids, and that was fun. That is when I started tipping the scales heavier and heavier again (I was fat for a few years in college, but lost a lot of the weight my senior year, prior to getting sick.)

I got better and, as evidenced by my 1 year + running, was having no problems breathing. (Even my 10 day stint as a smoker earlier this year was really nothing. I was barely even inhaling because it hurts to do so.) So I am a bit nervous when I’m having pains on breathing deeply when running. I hope this is a temporary problem that will go away after a week or two running. If not, back to the doctor, but I don’t think I will ever go back onto steroids. I don’t want to get moon-faced again.

Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be. It's easy. All you need is love.

I ran for 3.1 miles in 30 minutes yesterday. I am a bit shocked I did as well as I did. My lungs hurt a little bit more than usual, but my recovery time was amazingly swift. I finished running, and about 10 minutes later I was separating laundry and doing my regular chores.

While I was running, it felt good. It felt really good. I know that I spent 36 ½ years not running, but I have really become addicted to it over the past year. Last night as I did my chores, and then my nephew came over to help plan more of the Thailand trip, I felt better than I had in a few weeks. I don’t think it is a coincidence that I felt bad Sunday afternoon, or that I’ve become lethargic at times in the evenings recently.

This morning, feeling fine. Feeling very good as a matter of fact. No real major pains, aches or breathing problems. So now I will just keep doing this through 02/07/2007.

I will want to start following my calorie intake more than I thought yesterday. I just ate & ate yesterday. Not all terrible things, but I stuffed myself. I think I need to learn to limit myself some, and the only way I seem to be able to do that is by writing it all down.

Finally, I wanted to plug a new album. I know that they don’t need my endorsement, but the new The Beatles “Love” mash up CD is fantastic. This was produced by Sir George Martin, the only person who can ever really be considered the “Fifth Beatle” as he produced all of The Beatles albums except “Let It Be,” though he did do all the back tracking & oversaw all the original recording on it. But he and his son have taken and re-produced the songs, with bits from other Beatles songs, and it flows so wonderfully. Just as an example, on the Love version of “Get Back,” it starts with the beginning strum from “A Hard Day’s Night,” and they you get the drum solo & part of the guitar solo from “Carry That Weight” off of “Abbey Road,” which makes a magical opening for the song, and then near the end is the crescendo from “A Day in the Life,” which segues into “Glass Onion.” It is amazing to hear how all these little pieces work together.

Throughout, the album are little nuggets that Beatle fans will hear in the background of one song that weren’t really a part of the original track, even if the song is only changed a little bit. The end of “I Am the Walrus” includes a bit more background than the original, and then a crowd is heard with an introduction of The Beatles into short version of “I Wanna Hold Your Hand,” which isn’t really changed, just remixed to sound fresh and crisp. Hearing it like this makes you realize why so many kids went crazy for the group in 1964. They were happy, smiley, and the song grabs you for a screaming run for less than 1 ½ minutes, but it is infectious.

On the “Drive My Car” portion, there is extra chanting in the backing vocals, then it merges into “What You’re Doing,” “The Word,” and then back to the famous “Beep Beep, Beep Beep, Yeah” from “Drive My Car as the song fades out.

“Strawberry Fields Forever” starts with a demo John Lennon did that is included on the “Anthology” CD, and then the famous released version from 1966 is faded in, to make a fuller, richer feel. Elements of “Baby, You’re a Rich Man,” “Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band,” “Piggies,” “Penny Lane” and “Hello Goodbye” are incorporated into the ending. It is just done so well that you have to smile while listening to it.

But my favorite track is the version of “A Day in the Life,” which to me has always represented the best of The Beatles. No other group has ever been able to end and album with a better song than this one that ended the “Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band “album. There is no real update to the song, no added bits from another Beatles song, just the original remixed and remastered to sounds new, to sound fantastic.

Once you listen to it, you know why, 36 years after they broke up, The Beatles music is still important, and is still the benchmark for all music that came after it. This isn’t to take away from any music that came after it. As a matter of fact, it helps to celebrate almost all music that came after The Beatles broke up. When you listen to “Love” you recognize where today’s artists, and most all artists since 04/10/1970 when the band officially broke up, got a lot of their influence. This album is a love fest with all of The Beatles music, and it is a mash note from probably the biggest Beatles fan, Sir George Martin, to all of The Beatles fans. A pure joy.

In my defeat I wish I knew you were safely at home

Good weekend for me, for the most part. I’ve kind of gotten over spending too much money on the one intra-Thailand flight, and I’ve worked through my anger at the guy who fixed my treadmill, only to break it while he was fixing it.

I didn’t run yesterday. With the Steelers game and, well, just being lazy, I didn’t run. For some reason, I didn’t feel too well yesterday either. Just achy & feverish all afternoon, although that didn’t stop me from wolfing down KFC for the game and again late dinner (leftovers from the Steelers game at my grandfather’s house.)

So tonight, I get back to running. To be honest, I am a little worried. I know that I’ve lost a lot in the past month. Even though I did run right after I came back from the UK, as I mentioned yesterday, I have run my regular route 4 ½ times since I came back on 11/25/2006. I ran outdoors 4 times total since the treadmill broke, and that was a very abbreviated run, not the distance or the time that I do on the treadmill.

So tonight, at about 6 pm, I will get back onto the treadmill with my new, fancy running shorts and try to run 3 miles in 30 minutes. I don’t know if I have the stamina to do it, but I will try. And I will get back to doing that 5 times a week. Exciting, eh?

And it is about time. I am starting to really feel the effects. Clothes are getting just a touch tighter than they were. My stamina just isn’t what it used to be. I will not keep count of my food calories again until January 2, 2007. I just know that it will get annoying each time I go over the amount I want to limit myself to, and then I’ll get all bitchy. And I don’t want to be a beotch for Christmas.

I'm fixing a hole where the rain gets in and stops my mind from wandering where it will go

Got the new screw for the treadmill put on. Got new mylar cover for the board to protect any wear & tear on it from the rubber tread. Got the front belt tightened. And then, as the fix-it man was tightening the screw on the bracket, which is the wrought iron leg that holds the board and back roller in place, it snaps. Thinking I had it all covered, I knew that I had a bracket sent to me from when the last screw broke, so I went and found it in my storage room downstairs, and it is the left bracket, so it won't work. What kind of luck is that?

Now, he put some glue on it for now and says that this should hold up fine for a few weeks of running. He is ordering a new bracket and will replace it when he gets it. But for today, I ran 15 minutes (plus whatever he had me running while he was adjusting the tread and making sure the bolts were put in correct.) I will do another 15 minutes tomorrow, and then back to 30 minutes on Monday. Yeah me!

Because this is my blog about my exercise, one more thing I will talk about is what has happened over the past two weeks. As of this morning, I was at 224 lbs, but I don't think that covers what has happened to my body. As an example, I worked at the movie theater last night, and instead of taking tickets like I have been doing (which involves sitting in a chair, tearing the ticket - not a lot of action) I was an usher, cleaning the theaters.

When I got home last night, my inner thighs had become chafed from so much walking. In a mere two weeks, though I hadn't put on too much actual weight, My body had softened enough that my thighs got just larger enough to irritate when I walked for 6 hours around the theater last night.

Odd thing is that this is a problem I used to have when I was heavier, but when I started working at the theater last year I was always an usher, and I must have built up some muscle, cause I don't remember this being a problem since I started there. But now that I've stopped running for two weeks (although the more I think of it, really, I've only run for one week out of the past month. I stopped running on 11/15/2006 for UK trip, then went to UK, came back on 11/24/2006, ran, and then the bolt broke 12/02/2006) I am having fat guy problems again.

I think after I get back to running regularly, I need to look into the strength exercising to see about how I can make sure I don't have these problems again. My legs have always been big, but I think that there is a way to exercise to maximize muscle on my upper legs, thus burning more fat, and therefore reduce their mass. Something to look into for the future.

It ha's just been a strange week so far for me, some if it back luck, some of it just being a dumbass. I took vacation time to work half days, then worked overtime. Not a bad thing as I get paid for the time I worked, but kind of frustrating.

I've been hammering out details of the trip to Thailand with Eltee and my nephew (though to be honest, the nephew just keeps saying "Wherever you want to go, I'll go" when asked what he wants to do in Thailand.) Then, last night, I got all the information to get an intra-Thailand flight to save us a 20+ hour bus ride (you need passport info prior to buying the plane ticket, and Air Asia was having a fare sale if you bought before 12/17/2006, and I didn't have Eltee's passport info) and I then buy the ticket...for the wrong fucking day! I know how I did it; it was just a simple dumbass move. So literally two minutes after I bought the original tickets, I paid a fee and changed the flight back two days. Waste of my money, and that is annoying.

Well, that is all behind me now, so that is good. I did pay too much for a flight, but I have it and it is all good. I think I will try to blog from Thailand, but it is usually dial up, and might take several minutes for an entry, so I will only do a few sentences. Oh, and probably no running. I am only bringing sandals, and I don’t think I want to run in most places. I am hoping the 105 degree heat with 98% humidity will help me melt off some food I will be eating (and beer I will be drinking.) But I was also hoping all the walking in UK would help me melt off the bangers & mash, and that didn’t happen.

The sun'll come out tomorrow. Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, there'll be sun!

Saturday. They can come on Saturday. That is the earliest they can get here. When I called the guy on the phone after the parts arrived for the treadmill on Monday, he said “I will be in Pittsburgh on Saturday.” And I said “Well, I don’t work on Friday, so you can show up any time on Friday.” To which he replied, in a very whiney voice, “But I’ll be in Pittsburgh on Saturday.”

So what can I do? I can’t say “When I paid over $200 for the warranty, I didn’t seem to care if you could show up when it is convenient for you. I thought the money would go towards making my life a bit easier, but what do I know?”

So whoever had December 16 on the poll, you would win money…if there was any to win. I am just annoyed that it takes two weeks to get anything done on the treadmill. Although, in all fairness, that is better than the first time it broke.

So now I need to run again until February 8, 2007. That is the day I will be stepping on the plane for the 29 hour journey to Bangkok.

I ran again on Monday. The legs worked better on the pavement, but it was still just this side of too cold and my lungs were shredded again just a little bit. Not too bad, but I was coughing more afterwards than I had been, and there was just the hint of a cough yesterday. I seem to be bad at picking when to run, as last night it was in the low 50’s when I was outside at 7 pm doing some leaf raking. So I should have run, but didn’t even plan on it (which isn’t just an excuse, it can be a way of life…that was what I’d say for years as I was getting fatter and fatter “I didn’t plan on eating that Double Whopper with cheese, I just did.”)

I will try again tonight; see how far I can go. I have been running outside about every other day, and my legs are hurting less and less. It is only the lungs that are giving me problems, but that is mostly from my running in sub-freezing temperatures. Cause I’m an idiot who can’t seem to pull up weather.com!

Well, I’m off to work. I woke up at 5 am to the visiting cat vomiting on my cell phone, so I got up and cleaned that up. I think it might be time for a new cell phone for Mike!

I wanted to leave you with a quote from a friend, but I don’t think I could get it right. Something about inserting a finger once a month being shear joy, but that isn’t the exact quote. I just know I laughed all evening long over that one. Oh yeah, good times.

You don't want to sound dumb - don't want to offend, so don't call me a faggot, not unless you are a friend

On the nights that I take tickets at the movie theater, I get to crowd watch, as I face the large lobby we have with video games, tables and chairs and the concession stand. I am always surprised by how many kids spend hours in our lobby playing games and eating food either before or after the movie. We also have a balcony that overlooks the lobby, only used when someone has a party, as the party rooms are upstairs.

On Saturday, there were two boys that spent some time in the lobby, both probably mid-teenagers like 15-17 years old. I noticed them at first because of the way they looked. One was tall and gangly with a thick bush of curly hair. Think Napoleon Dynamite, curly and severely parted on one side, but thicker. He kept putting his chin down and forcefully parting it with each hand and pulling it back as he put his neck up to get it out of his eyes. He was wearing brown corduroys and a brown button down shirt.

The other one was tall and wiry, but was wearing girls jeans. Skin tight black girls jeans. They looked strange to me when I first saw him, and I asked a co-worker, and she verified that the cut of the jeans made them girls jeans. He was also wearing a skin tight print t-shirt and neon green and white checkered shoes, with no socks, and glasses. And he was quite effeminate. Carried himself a bit more delicate, stood a little more leaning on one leg that you’d see a girl standing. This is by no means any type of judgment call on him. Most of the guys I’ve dated have been much more effeminate. I like guys with a little sugar in their tank. Just describing that he was effeminate.

They went to the concession stand and got one large drink and one order of fries, walked to the lobby and sat at the table closest to me, about 25 feet away. After a few minutes, I noticed that they were feeding each other French fries and sharing the drink. And to be honest, they were being playful about it, not sexual or sensual about it, but also not shoving it in each others mouths. And it wasn’t every French fry, just here and there.

After they finished eating, they went to play “Virtual Tennis.” And Bushy Hair wasn’t as good as Tight Jeans, and Tight Jeans got happy when he made a point in the game he would squeal. Then Bushy stopped playing, but was cheering on Jeans. I then noticed that Bushy was rubbing Jeans back with his open palm, very affectionately, but again, there wasn’t anything sensual about it. It was tender, but nothing lurid and I just remember thinking that they were acting like a couple without it being obvious. I also kept wondering if they had been a boy and a girl or if they both acted hyper masculine, would I have noticed at all?

They went on to one of those large shooting games, and one was good and the other wasn’t, but the one that wasn’t good at it was cheering on the other one. It was very cute, very couple-ish, but without it being obvious. There was no overt hand holding, or any type of groping that I saw (I did still have to tear tickets from time to time, so I might have missed something obvious.)

Then I heard something, but I wasn’t sure what I heard. I could see a change in the demeanor of Bushy & Jeans. I saw what looked like their backs stiffening up. They didn’t directly look anywhere, but something had affected them. Then I heard a low, guttural chuckle from the balcony, and I looked up. There were two men, mid 30-ish, overweight and one was balding with a goatee, and they were saying something loudly. I could see that they were looking directly at the two boys at the video game. Then I heard the word “Faggot” quite clearly. I felt the white hot anger rising in me.

I asked my nephew, who was working the concession stand, to come out and watch the ticket booth. I walked up the stairs to the two men standing on the balcony. I got up next to them and, quite loudly, I said “Excuse me. Could you please learn to show respect to all of our patrons?”

The balding guy, who was doing all the talking/joking, looked at me with shock while his friend backed away. He meekly, very meekly, said “I am with the birthday party.”

“I understand that, sir, however we do ask that you show the same respect to our other patrons that they show to you and your party.” I said this while taking one step closer to him. I was about 4 or 5 inches taller than him. By this time, his friend had backed away a good deal, and this poor bastard was just standing there with the balcony railing to his back. I did step just closer to him, probably within 6 inches of him. He still said nothing.

“Sir, we do not tolerate anyone treating any of our patrons in such a rude manner as I observed you doing. If you are unable to comply with that, I will escort you out of the building. Do you understand me?”

There were some people looking at me, but not too many. I think most were trying to ignore what was happening, and the people in the lobby couldn’t hear me too well with all the noise from the big screen that showed movie trailers and the different video games. But a few of the parents from the party were certainly aware of what was going on. And still, no one was saying a word, including pudgy little balding homophobic goatee bully.

“Sir, before I will leave, I will need you to show me you understand what will happen if you continue to show disrespect towards our other patrons. Do you understand?’

He nodded his head like a fucking coward. I would have guessed he was about to piss himself from the look on his face.

I then turned my head to his friend to the left who had backed away. I know he didn’t say anything, but he was laughing along when he thought it was alright for his friend to make comments. “Do you understand as well?”

“I didn’t say anything!” was his response. Like a 5 year old that was caught. This is what we have to put up with in society? One balding guy who cowers the second anyone confronts them and another one who wants to push all blame on the friend who he was probably prodding along by laughing at him making fun of two boys who were less than half their age and who were just playing video games.

“But you understand what will happen when you treat our patrons rudely?” I asked pointedly again.

“Yes,” was all he could get out.

“Good. Enjoy the rest of your stay here at our theater.” It was actually after they had the movie, so they were probably leaving shortly anyway.

I went back to my chair tearing tickets. To be honest, my heart was racing for several reasons. I thought management would come up to me and say something. When a manager finally wondered around later on, I asked if they had heard anything about what happened, and she said nope, but the mother who paid for the party thanked them for a great time. I told her kind of what I did, and she said she’d have been OK with that, as long as I wasn’t threatening them.

I also thought goatee guy, after some thought, would finally grow some balls and try to confront me. I saw him slink out the door with his wife and son without looking towards me or the two boys that he seemed fine with trying to terrorize earlier, who were back to playing video games in the lobby.

I saw the boys go to their movie. From what I could gather a few hours later, they had come to the theater with one of their parents, and the parents had gone to see “Bobby,” which is like 2 ½ hours long. They went to see something else that was much shorter (they didn’t go on my side, they had to go on the other side. I only tear tickets for theaters 12-22, and their theater was on the 1-11 side.) and I saw the parents and the boys meet a few hours later at a table. The boys went back to playing video games, dancing around effeminately when they did something good, touching each other tenderly, one rubbing the others back, and having a good time. Without fear of any harassment.

When the whole clan was leaving, I did see Tight Jeans put his coat on, look over at me for a moment and smile, a big, broad smile. He then rubbed the back of Bushy Hair, as they walked out the door.

I don’t know if they were gay, though I would assume at least one was, Tight Jeans. I don’t even know if they were a couple, as they didn’t try to push the boundaries as much as I thought they could have (though feeding each other fries is intimate in my book.) But I felt great that I was able to make them feel a tiny bit safer from bullies when they are in my movie theater. And I made those two fucking bullies (don’t be mistaken, the bully and the guy who laughs and eggs on the bully are both bullies) look like the assholes that they are. And I didn’t get in a fight; I was able to use my height and size to at least make them accept my viewpoint.

And I still think goatee guy peed himself just a little bit.

I'll forgive the lies that I heard before when you gave me no reply

5 days later...no part for the treadmill, therefore no fixed treadmill. I ran on Wednesday outside, but since then Pittsburgh has experienced some freezing weather, so I have not ventured outside to run.

I was told 3-5 days to receive the part. I will reiterate, I called on Monday morning about noontime. That should have been day 1, but if not, Tuesday is day 1. That makes Saturday day 5. Fucking fuck nuts. Anger rising. Just go back to my early February rants about this and repeat it here. While they take their sweet time, I am going to get fat again.

Actually, I seem to have stayed at 222 lbs this week. I settled there and have stayed there. Not bad, considering I am doing little sustained cardio work (I spent three hours this morning cleaning the bathroom, and though I did sweat, I don’t think that constitutes a good cardio workout.) I am not overeating like I have on weekends in the past, probably because I fear the fact that I am not running I will get fatter.

On a happier note, I got my tickets to Thailand for me and the nephew. Less than $900 each for 3 weeks traveling to the wonderful country of Thailand (and then back to Pittsburgh in wintertime.) That is a load of off my mind. Now I can get down to planning what to do on each day. As I said before, Eltee will do a lot of the daily planning, but I want to make sure that we are seeing everything that the nephew wants to see.

I also am a bit worried that his first flight includes a 13 + hour transpacific flight from Chicago to Tokyo. After that, the 7 + hour flight from Tokyo to Bangkok is going to seem like a puddle jump, dontcha think? I hope he isn't too bored. I have a feeling he is going to try to swipe my iPod to listen to it the whole trip. Little does he realize Uncle Mike won't have any of that cool hip hop on his iPod that all the 19 year olds like. He'll listen to all the 80's music I have - cum on feel the noize!

Well, that is it for a rare Saturday post for me. I need to get ready to work at the movie theatre with both of my twin nephews, speaking of the little devils. If I end up having a second date with the guy I went on a date with Thursday evening, I will talk about it. Right now, I'm going to keep mum about it and see if it is anything other than one nice little drinks date.

By the way, this is post #150 for me. Again, like when I reached 100 posts, I am surprised with myself that I've made it this far. I don't think people understand how much keeping this blog has helped me work on getting into better shape. And this week was important, as I was able to look back and see exactly what I was feeling when the treadmill broke the first time, and now that I anticipated that, I am not a seething bag of rage...I am angry, but not like February when I didn't know how sucky the warranty is on NordicTrack equipment. I know it will get fixed, though, so that is important.

When I get to 200 posts, I hope to be able to be posting pictures of me, and my progress. That should give me about 4 more months to figure that out on Blogger. Wish me luck!!

I scream "merry eiffel tower high"

After reading some things online, I decided that, until I start running again, I am going to up my calorie intake to 2,000/day. I know I need to be careful about the content, but I will work it until I get back to running.

I feel better today about my lungs. I don’t know what happened, but even last night I was coughing a bit still. I might even try to run a little tonight because it is supposed to get to 48 degrees, and I think that is better than the mid-20’s on my lungs. But I still don’t want to push it. Monday was really, really bad.

Not much else going on in my life right now. I am trying to get everything together for my 3 week trip to Thailand with one of my nephews in February/March.

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it before on here, but I bring my nieces & nephews on a trip anywhere in the world they want to go when they graduate high school. I do put some conditions, usually at least a B average, or 3.0 GPA. But I understand that not everyone is built the same way and their brains don’t work the same way, so as long as I don’t perceive them as slackers, and they actually worked hard but just weren’t cut out to make a B reading Shakespeare, I will take them anywhere.

It has actually helped my 14 y/o nephew. He wasn’t doing so well, even got himself out of a catholic school because it was too much hard work, and then my sister had me talk to him, telling him that he has to show that he worked hard before I’d take him on a trip. This was 2 years ago, and he has shown tremendous strides according to my sister. He is in public school, but he has been on the honor roll most of last year and so far this year. I got no problem using this has a bribe/

Now I make this seem like I’ve done some great thing, but in reality I’ve only done it with 2 kids so far. My niece graduated high school in 2002 with a 4.0, and we went to Paris for a week. Then, last year, her twin brothers graduated high school, and her younger brother chose Paris as well. And if you budget it, it isn’t that expensive. And for christ’s sake, I’m the gay uncle – I’m supposed to have excess money! I’m not having my own kids, I might as well spend the money on someone’s kids.

Sadly, his twin brother started his post high school education before he became aged 18, and that is one of my rules. They must be aged 18 before I will take responsibility for them internationally. If they are under aged 18, there are some things they aren’t able to do in case there is legal problems, and I’d have to have Power-of-Attorney on them, and I don’t want to have to go through all of that. Once they are 18, they can speak for themselves and I don’t have to try to produce legal papers to have emergency surgery done on them. It is complicated, but most kids who graduate high school are either aged 18 or will be by the end of summer.

The other twin nephew is going to be going to Thailand when he graduates from his trade school, which will be February 7, 2007. I have not made the final arraignments, but it will be very shortly after that date. It might even be the next day, as one airline is have a sale that ends February 8, 2007, which would save me about $350 total, but I just don’t know if I want to leave on a Thursday.

Someone asked me why I do this. Well, it is for many reasons, but truly the most important one to me is that when I was 18, I wanted more than anything to be able to travel, especially overseas. And I couldn’t and didn’t. We were quite poor, and I sat in my room dreaming of the possibility, but knowing I’d never do it. I didn’t leave the county for the first time until I was 28, and that was only Canada. I didn’t travel overseas until I was 32. And a half.

I figure that if I let them travel overseas now, they will not be afraid to do it again in the future. Once you’ve traveled in a different country, especially one that doesn’t speak our language, you can do it again. It also leaves open the door if they need a passport for some future job (m niece went into a program in forensic pathology with an eye towards the FBI as an employer.)

And the final thing it does is open their eyes to other people, other cultures and other languages. They get to see more than just the USA way to do things. I never say that one way is better or worse, but it is different, and I think that can only help a young person see things maybe differently, have more of a world view of things, especially in this post 9/11 world we live in.

Once in Thailand, I get lucky in that my friend Eltee is already over there, and he knows the country quite well. For those who don’t know, Eltee is my friend from Edmonton. He is about 55 y/o, really structured, and just a nice guy who decided to retire in his 40’s cause he didn’t want to work for someone else again. He actually manages his investments, and reads a lot about business and investments and tax codes and all the like, but he does it all on his own time.

One of the things that he does to save money is to winter in Thailand. He has spent 8 of the 9 winters I’ve known him in Thailand. He is going to help me organize the trip and be our guide, but he won’t do the day trips to different sites. He will do what he normally does, get his news fix reading the papers and drink beer while we are gone to some historic site.

Now I start the process of buying tickets. I will be interested in what price the travel agent can get me. I am assuming around $1,000/person/flight. Maybe as high as $1,200. I hope less, but I fear more.

In the quiet silent seconds I turned off the light switch

My lungs are killing me! I went out running last night. Outside, as in the frigid cold. And for some reason, this has put a major hurting on my lungs. I didn’t realize that the cold air would do that, but I felt like I had bronchitis last night. When I was a smoker, I used to get bronchitis all the time, twice a year. You get this thick, heavy feeling in your lungs, and you have that rattling, throaty cough. I was having that after I got back from running. I hope I didn’t do any type of damage, cause here it is the next morning and I am still coughing. We shall see.

I am going to try to use my friend Bethany’s treadmill once or twice this week, but it would be terribly invasive to use it 5 times this week. She has the treadmill in her living room, and she lives with her sister, so that would be very disruptive to run in her living room each evening. It is just like mine, though, so it would work great. Maybe Friday afternoon and Saturday I will be able to do that. We really shall see.

I got back on the diet yesterday, though through bad math I did have 1700 calories yesterday instead of the 1600. Problem with that is that when you eat fewer calories, you should be exercising. This tells your body that it isn’t being starved and burns up the extra calories. Sadly, if I don’t run every day, I fear that my body will think that it is being starved and will slow down the metabolism and store fat. Again, we shall see.

I want to note that I am supposed to have another date this week, but I will talk about it more after the date. If it ends up happening. He seems like a busy person, and I am very busy this weekend for some reason. We shall see.

Jacquito: "What are you scared of, old man?" Grandpa Simpson: "Everything! Dogs... Dutchmen...the gathering darkness..." *glances around nervously*

The treadmill has broken again. It is the same screw on the same leg that broke. I originally thought that it was the opposite screw on the opposite leg, but after reading my archives from February, I realized it is the same one. So yeah, not happy about that one.

Running outside isn’t fun for me, but I will do it. I have the route picked out and went over it yesterday. It is a lot tougher than I’d ever imagine, but what else can I do? The route is going to be about 1.6 miles total, but the middle part, about .5 miles, is uphill, so that is going to make up for less time running. I could always do it about twice, but I am promising myself nothing.

As far as food goes…I wasn’t as good this weekend as I’d like to be, but I wasn’t horrible. I came out here on Monday at 226 lbs. I just need to think about this long and hard. Either I do it or I don’t, cause I’m tired of taking care of my food/calorie count for Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday only to eat all I want on Thursday through Sunday. And it seems to be complacency, plain and simple. But I have to remember that complacency is what got me to be over 260 lbs in the first place.

I am currently on the phone with NordicTrack, and let me tell you, they have the absolute worse customer service in the world. They aren’t open on weekends, and from my last experience with them, they don’t answer their phones the last two hours of their workday. I have currently been on hold for 13 minutes, and there is nothing but cheesy electronica music playing. I think it is set up this way so that you will hang up on them. The worst part is that I know this phone call isn’t worth anything. I will be on hold for no reason as I forgot to write down my serial number, but since I’ve gone this far I might as well stay on until someone tells me I need it.

Update: OH MY GOD! I just spent 20 minutes on hold, told the person what the problem was and she told me that I was out of the warranty and that she could supply the part but service would cost me. I advised that I bought the extended 3 year warranty for an extra $250+…at which point she told I had to call another place for the extended warranty to cover all of my needs.

Update, part deux: So now I am on hold with the extended warranty, and they seem to employ the exact same tact as NordicTrack, keep me on hold for an extended time with annoyingly bad music. They do give me the option to leave my name and number for a return phone call, but I don’t trust them. If readers remember from February, it was an ordeal to get this problem fixed the last time.

Update, finale: Well, as I suspected back in February, I am getting the same level of customer service. 3-5 days to get the part, and then the technician will make an appointment after the part is received to get the appointment to fix the treadmill. I am assuming, with my work schedule, the earliest possible chance I have to get this treadmill fixed is 12/15/2006. But there is a chance it will take until 12/22/2006 (I work 10 hour days Monday through Thursday, so it makes it difficult to get anything done on days other than Fridays.)

Any bets on when this will actually get done? I should start placing odds.